Eating Fiberglass

Thursday....Damn. There's nothing worse than waking up and thinking it's Friday only to be let down by the cold, hard realization that it's Thursday; Friday's ugly twin.

So Serg just made me remember that some fucking bastards stole my idea. Seriously, I thought that shit up over two years ago. I swear, if I ever become friends with a millionaire, I'll make him a billionaire. I've got ideas that would make you shit yourself. But I guess it's good not to live in the past.

Last night Spectre and I did our show on the radio. It's "Enjoy Mute w/ DJ Spectre & MC Monarch" on 89.5fm up here in Orygun. It went pretty good, even though I was drunk and there was no bathroom around since school isn't in session. I ended up pissing the garbage can. Don't tell Spectre. I'm thinking about making that a weekly deal on the show, "Guess where Monarch pissed tonight!?" But somehow I think that's only funny to me.

Speaking of teh funny, I've taken it upon myself to revive the art of joke-telling, as I'm sure many of my close friends can tell you. There's a slight problem with that. You see, most of my jokes are told (almost always correctly) while I'm drunk. So I can never keep it straight as to who I've told what joke to. I'm pretty sure that's the reason why joke telling died in the first place. A bunch of dirty hippies that kept calling their parents telling them the same jokes over and over. The parents call the cops on their wayward children, and jailarity ensues.
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I'm so horny, I could fuck a goat.
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Tonight I'm going for a ride on my new (to me) bike with The Larry and The Drunk. I'm looking forward to hauling some ass and testing the aerodynamics of my fancy helmet. Damn thing's probably worth as much as the silly little bike. But I look damn good in it, so fack off.

Do me a favor, go read a book.